So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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