Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
