well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He shit in the fireplace
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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