I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
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