is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Girls should come with a carfax report
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
