You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Where did you get a picture of my penis
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i will never coherently bang her
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
