okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
