Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
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