lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
