its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.