so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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