Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
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You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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