Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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