And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
God, I missed his penis.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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