if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize