carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
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I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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