So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
