How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Pooping to opera.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
