Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
