We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?