ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize