she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
