6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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