i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
