After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
He has the fingertips of a God
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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