Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
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