Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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