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• (714): View more from California

  she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.

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• (315): View more from New York

  So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  Why were you not born a dude?

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  Because god wanted to level the playing field

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• (305): View more from Florida

  Also the fuck cup must be buried with me

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.

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