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• (+34): View more from Spain

  Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I don't know where I am but there are firefighters

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• (251): View more from Alabama

  you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...

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• (626): View more from California

  I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for

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• (516): View more from New York

  Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (707): View more from California

  Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.

  (630): View more from Illinois

  As weird as it sounds I would totally be down

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?

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