You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
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These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
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You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.