she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I have fence marks all over my body
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize