By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize