I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Randomize