Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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