There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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