someone get that fucking seahorse.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
