Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures

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(586) You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures http://tfl.nu/u67a

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...

(203): View more from Connecticut

Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings

(202): View more from Washington, DC

But what if he licks everyones ass?

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(202): So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking... (203): Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings (202): But what if he licks everyones ass? http://tfl.nu/5mfw

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(301): View more from Maryland

That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.

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(301): That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk. http://tfl.nu/t1w6

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(859): View more from Kentucky

i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes

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(859): i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes http://tfl.nu/xf12

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(805): View more from California

we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home

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(805): we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home http://tfl.nu/wods

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf

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(978): i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf http://tfl.nu/hwzk

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(317): View more from Indiana

Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.

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(317): Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success. http://tfl.nu/9gb8

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(256): View more from Alabama

I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.

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(256): I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him. http://tfl.nu/7zd5

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(512): View more from Texas

If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.

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(512): If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome. http://tfl.nu/rgpf

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(613): View more from Ontario

just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee

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(613): just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee http://tfl.nu/8pkh

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(805): View more from California

I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.

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(805): I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it. http://tfl.nu/eeuf

Replies (4) Good night (687) Bad night (1207)
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(801): View more from Utah

I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...

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(801): I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you... http://tfl.nu/j9so

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th

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(201): I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th http://tfl.nu/okx6

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.

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(413): She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list. http://tfl.nu/zy3q

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(540): View more from Virginia

I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.

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(540): I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped. http://tfl.nu/us3c

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