I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Text me some of your sweat
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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