i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
