You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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