He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize