Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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