I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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