first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize