Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize
