I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
