If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
We are two peas in an std pod
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
