I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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