I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
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First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
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Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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