So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
