it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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