i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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